I made it to 19k XD
Chubbs died on the 10th.
I've got to rant.
Because I find things out late, and they piss me off. And i'm already in a bad mood to start with.
I have a boyfriend of which is semi fucked in the head right now.
It's a long story, so i'll stick it into weird point form that leaves ALOT out. XDLast summer
Boys mom hates boys girlfriend.
Boy is afraid of his mother.
Boy lies to both mother and girlfriend because boy is scared of everything.
Boy lies to girlfriend to hurt her so she'll break up with HIM so he doesn't have to do it himsef,because he still loves her.
Boy lies to mother so he can keep coming to see GF.
Boy lies to friends to keep his mother from finding out.
Everything is a confused fucked up mess.
Gf finally finds out he's been lying, calls boys mother, the lie comes out.
Boy leaves for college.
Boy brings gf to college with him. Wont let her leave due to being scared of her leaving for good.
GF finds out boy lied to friends, makes him write an apology email.
Things go uphill.
Things are great.This summer
Boys mother screams at boy for being with GF because apparently she's 'evil'.
Boy lies again and pretends to break up with GF.
This time GF knows about it.
Boy lies to mother to stay with GF.
Boy lies to GF when he wants to do stuff he thinks GF will hate.
Boy lies to friends AGAIN.
GF finds out.
Boy writes apology letter to friends for lying.
Things start getting better with Boy and GF.
Things are rocky, but okay.
This has been going on for the past year.
But you know what pisses me off more than the scared Boy and his lies?
The friends who, after already been lied to before about this, believe boy...and turn their noses up at GF.
It makes me sick. Just completely sick to my stomach.
I go to them for help. I explain what goes on. And yet, when he sits there..and lies to their faces, they'd much rather believe a penis, than that penises heart-broken girlfriend.
All of them make up excuses not to believe me. They all have their own agendas for "helping me". They claim to care and be there for me.
And then they go and stab me in the fucking back because my man happens to have a pair of huge beautiful brown eyes.
I explain everything to them. The sick twisted disgusting lies and things he has done , and what do they do?
"Aww, poor boy. You must me so pained."
Oh yea. He's in SO much pain.
Because you know, i'm the fucking liar here, right?
I'm the one that lied before about this shit, right?
Anyone who knows me, even just a LITTLE bit, knows that I HATE lies. I hate them with a passion.
And i'd NEVER lie to ANYONE, let alone my fucking friends.
And this is what makes me sick. They know this, yet they turn their backs on me. And make me the bad guy.
Because he's someone to flirt with.
And yes, I stay with him.
He's made me paranoid (with good reason to be) but i'm working on that. It's something I can't just get over.
I stay with him because as stupid as he was/is being, we are in love with eachother and we are happy together.
I'm trying to help him with everything I have. All of my being. He was there for me EVERY fucking step when I was ill. So ill I rarely left the house for a whole fucking year.
And I'm giving him back what he gave me.
He still lies about stupid little things, but no where near what he did before. (Which I will not go into.)
That's what love is.
It's not about looks. It's not about what cloths people wear,or how well someone can do something.Its' not about butterflies dancing around in your stomach when they touch you.
It's about loving eachother. It's about being there for eachother and helping eachother when they need it most.
It's about forgiveness.
You don't know what true love is untill you've experienced it through the worst of times.
Untill you've been through the roughest time of your life with that person and you come out together. No matter how long it takes.
That is what love is.
No, I don't want people to hate Boy. I've never wanted anyone to hate him ,that was never the point of talking.
He's an amazing, smart guy that makes really stupid choices, and I love him.
I'm in love with him.
When I come to people to talk, it's to vent and just talk. Not to push opinions.
All I want is some place to go when I'm in need of help. Your friends are supposed to be that place.
I want people to listen and not take sides. And just BE there for me.
But, I suppose that was way too much to ask. Stock/Animal